Dear so and so..

Thank you to the luvvvvly Kat at 3 Bedroom Bungalow for bringing back the fantabulous Dear So and So...
Go write your own and link it up via Kat's site.



Dear Che,

Oh son of mine. You are a gorgeous, happy little chap. And yes, you were such a brave boy after that nurse viciously attacked you with that needle, and yes I acknowledge the fact that you even thanked her for it by giving her your bestest ever cheeky grin and saying 'Ta'..
However, if you continue to shit your kecks every 5 minutes I WILL have to staple your arse together.
Mmmmm kay?

Love you lots
Mumma x

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Dear venues in Norwich

Sort out your licencing for private hire of your function rooms. Organising a wedding is hard enough without SO many of you not allowing under 18's on the premises after 8pm.

Yours flabbergasted

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Dear Hubby to be,

Coming home that drunk after only 2 hours down the pub with your mate and making me drive him home because he is vomiting too much to get a cab is NOT cool. Got it?

Love your future wifey.

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Dear Dr.

The fact that I am now on first name terms with your receptionist AND that she now recognises my voice each time I call and greets me with 'Morning Miss Lewis' before I've even introduced myself, tells me that I spend far too much time in your office.

With the above in mind, I would really appreciate it if you could stop sodding me about and start correctly diagnosing. I believe that is what you are paid so highly to do, is it not?

Please, I'm begging you.. Do me a favour and get it right already.

Yours, hopefully..

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Dear Dave the cat,

Seriously dude, If you knock one more thing over with your big arse I will confine you to the shed.
I don't care if it's cold and you would rather sleep on top of the Sky+ box to keep warm.. (Which incidentally keeps overheating because it now has a load of your bloody fur stuck in its vents) I *will* do it, you just try me..

Love your (very annoyed) owner